It occurred to me recently that I have never been this poor in my entire life. The economy in the UK is pretty bad, so wages are shockingly low compared to Canada (while the cost of living is higher) and I got a loan prior to moving here. My first three months in London were spent funemployed, applying for dozens of jobs each week, so the loan didn’t last long. Anyone who knows me well knows that I refuse to let money dictate my life – I’ve always silently resented people who miss out on great experiences due to a lack of funds or who run themselves ragged in the pursuit of a fat savings account. Admittedly, I am not very good with money and that is a large part of my problem. I buy mostly organic groceries and I eat out (albeit inexpensively) an average of five meals per week. I regularly splurge on non-essential “lifestyle” items like vinyl records and electronics. Plus, I have friends here who occasionally want to eat at nice-ish restaurants or go to comparatively-expensive cocktail bars (obviously in London there are no shortage of “upmarket” or “posh” places to eat and drink at and I wouldn’t describe any of the places I go to as being like that; still, a night out in SoHo is never cheap).
A more significant reason I don’t have much money (and have maintained a substantial debt) is because I’m constantly paying for art. On average, I see 2-3 shows per week, mostly theatre, and nearly all of them cost me money. I don’t regret these expenditures, even if some of the tickets are pretty expensive and not all the shows are fulfilling. I consider it research for the career I’m embarking on here. Having lived in Western Canada, where the theatre scene is comparatively small and dull, for 10 years prior to moving to London, I developed a hunger for theatre that is finally being satiated. I love that I live in the theatre capital of the world – a place where many people are raised on seeing theatre and it’s an experience that they still regard as important to their culture and they’re willing to pay for it. (This is how I was raised, too.) I can’t properly convey how unique this is compared to the rest of the world, where theatre is non-existent or, dare I say, dying.
My point is that despite an increasing debt, I have never been this happy. I am doing exactly what I want to be doing – constantly exposed to diverse, cutting-edge art; working on incredible creative projects; meeting interesting people. This is the life I envisioned for myself and I have been striving for. It’s not perfect – because perfection doesn’t exist (but having more money and friends here would sure make things easier) – but it is pretty damn good. I know the money will come eventually and, in the meantime, I’m unwilling to sacrifice my lifestyle and happiness for the pursuit of it. That is simply too valuable.